Coming Out Truthful

I am a man. I was born male, and I am attracted to females. This is how I am. Yet there are those who are born the same way I was, but they are attracted to males, and that is how they are. Then there are those who were born a certain way, yet they feel they are in the wrong body, so the person identifies as opposed to the way they were made. That is how they are born. The problem I have is that those who deny the fact the way they were created a certain way and puts up a façade to hide their truth.

I have a friend I used to hang out with, and he was homophobic. I felt uncomfortable about his comments and told him so. He also said that being an LGBTQ is a choice and I said no it isn't. He spoke about being in Vietnam, raised a family, and traveled. He also spoke of his exploits playing jazz and going to bed with a lot of women.

I then found out just recently, he came out as a transgender.

Generally, I couldn't care less about how a person's identity is, but years of gaybashing on her part made me upset. The fact that she lied her whole life disturbs me and lying about it does not help much either. I thought back when I did or at least felt the same. Growing up and going to a predominately white school, I wish I were white so that I would not get beaten up. It took me years of education and self-confidence to make me proud of being of Japanese ancestry and the contributions we made during WWII in Europe, Africa, and yes, Japan.

Granted, ethnicity and gender identities are apples and oranges, but the identifying oneself is still the same. I can't lie being Japanese, but I can lie about being straight...if I were not. So now I'm supposed to be grateful he came out after much homophobic? Yes, I know that people who don't come out tend to prove they are straight, but I find it more offensive that even though I couldn't care less how they were born, the person had to prove that they were straight.

When you hear crap over and over again, and you avoid them because the self-hatred keeps going on and on, it becomes tiresome. I remember meeting a young Asian American man I spoke to about being an Asian and eventually taking over their family business. The kid told me that his parents did not want to give the family-owned company to him. I asked why he said that he was gay.  I said oh. He asked if I were weirded out. I said, "I couldn't care less how you were born." This gave him a shock as I guess he expected me to say that it is his choice to be gay. I asked if he chose to be gay? He smiled and said no. I said you were born that way, and do what you think makes you happy.

As for my friend, I don't know how to react. Do I congratulate him or do I keep away from him? I'm, straight. Is that something to be proud of or is it just the way I am? In our "CHRISTIAN" moral society, there is only one form of identification, and that tends to lead to confusion. So below, I found a list of genders, and I hope if you are not the gender you were assigned, that you find out who you are and be truthful not only to others but to yourself.

Genderfluid Support

Abimegender: a gender that is profound, deep, and infinite; meant to resemble when one mirror is reflecting into another mirror creating an infinite paradox

Adamasgender: a gender which refuses to be categorized

Aerogender: a gender that is influenced by your surroundings

Aesthetigender: a gender that is derived from an aesthetic; also known as videgender

Affectugender: a gender that is affected by mood swings

Agender: the feeling of no gender/absence of gender or neutral gender

Agenderflux: Being agender and having fluctuating feelings of masculinity of femininity, but NOT male or female

Alexigender: a gender that is fluid between more than one gender but the individual cannot tell what those genders are

Aliusgender: a gender which is removed from common gender descriptors and guidelines

Amaregender: a gender that changes depending on who you’re in love with

Ambigender: defined as having the feeling of two genders simultaneously without fluctuation; meant to reflect the concept of being ambidextrous, only with gender

Ambonec: identifying as both man and woman, yet neither at the same time

Amicagender: a gender that changes depending on which friend you’re with

Androgyne: sometimes used in the case of “androgynous presentation”; describes the feeling of being a mix of both masculine and feminine (and sometimes neutral) gender qualities

Anesigender: feeling like a certain gender yet being more comfortable identifying with another

Angenital: a desire to be without primary sexual characteristics, without necessarily being genderless; one may be both angenital and identify as any other gender alongside

Anogender: a gender that fades in and out but always comes back to the same feeling

Anongender: a gender that is unknown to both yourself and others

Antegender: a protean gender which has the potential to be anything, but is formless and motionless, and therefore, does not manifest as any particular gender

Anxiegender: a gender that is affected by anxiety

Apagender: a feeling of apathy towards ones gender which leads to them not looking any further into it

Apconsugender: a gender where you know what it isn’t, but not what it is; the gender is hiding itself from you

Astergender: a gender that feels bright and celestial

Astralgender: a gender that feels connected to space

(POSSIBLE TRIGGER WARNING) Autigender: a gender that can only be understood in the context of being autistic. Meant for autistic people only.

Autogender: a gender experience that is deeply personal to oneself

Axigender: when a person experiences two genders that sit on opposite ends of an axis; one being agender and the other being any other gender; these genders are experienced one at a time with no overlapping and with very short transition time.

Bigender: the feeling of having two genders either at the same time or separately; usually used to describe feeling “traditionally male” and “traditionally female”, but does not have to

Biogender: a gender that feels connected to nature in some way

Blurgender: the feeling of having more than one gender that are somehow blurred together to the point of not being able to distinguish or identify individual genders; synonymous with genderfuzz

Boyflux: when one feels mostly or all male most of the time but experience fluctuating intensity of male identity

Burstgender: and gender that comes in intense bursts of feeling and quickly fades back to the original state

Caelgender: a gender which shares qualities with outer space or has the aesthetic of space, stars, nebulas, etc.

Cassgender: the feeling of gender is unimportant to you

Cassflux: when the level of indifference towards your gender fluctuates

Cavusgender: for people with depression; when you feel one gender when not depressed and another when depressed

Cendgender: when your gender changes between one and its opposite

Ceterofluid: when you are ceterogender and your feelings fluctuate between masculine, feminine, and neutral

Ceterogender: a nonbinary gender with specific masculine, feminine, or neutral feelings

Cisgender: the feeling of being the gender you were assigned at birth, all the time (assigned (fe)male/feeling (fe)male)

Cloudgender: a gender that cannot be fully realized or seen clearly due to depersonalization/derealization disorder

Collgender: the feeling of having too many genders simultaneously to describe each one

Colorgender: a gender associated with one or more colors and the feelings, hues, emotions, and/or objects associated with that color; may be used like pinkgender, bluegender, yellowgender

Commogender: when you know you aren’t cisgender, but you settled with your assigned gender for the time being

Condigender: a gender that is only felt during certain circumstances

Deliciagender: from the Latin word delicia meaning “favorite”, meaning the feeling of having more than one simultaneous gender yet preferring one that fits better

Demifluid: the feeling your gender being fluid throughout all the demigenders; the feeling of having multiple genders, some static and some fluid

Demiflux: the feeling of having multiple genders, some static and some fluctuating

Demigender: a gender that is partially one gender and partially another

Domgender: having more than one gender yet one being more dominant than the others

Demi-vapor (term coined by @cotton-blossom-jellyfish): Continuously drifting to other genders, feeling spiritually transcendental when doing so while having a clear -slightly blurred- inner visual of your genders, transitions, and positive emotions. Tied to Demi-Smoke.

Demi-smoke (term coined by @cotton-blossom-jellyfish): A transcendental, spiritual gender roughly drifting to other genders that are unable to be foreseen and understood, shrouded in darkness within your inner visual. Elevating through mystery. Caused by a lack of inner interpretation and dark emotional states. Tied to Demi-Vapor.

Duragender: from the Latin word dura meaning “long-lasting”, meaning a subcategory of multigender in which one gender is more identifiable, long lasting, and prominent than the other genders

Egogender: a gender that is so personal to your experience that it can only be described as “you”

Epicene: sometimes used synonymously with the adjective “androgynous”; the feeling either having or not displaying characteristics of both or either binary gender; sometimes used to describe feminine male identifying individuals

Espigender: a gender that is related to being a spirit or exists on a higher or extradimensional plane

Exgender:  the outright refusal to accept or identify in, on, or around the gender spectrum

Existigender: a gender that only exists or feels present when thought about or when a conscious effort is made to notice it

Femfluid: having fluctuating or fluid gender feelings that are limited to feminine genders

Femgender: a nonbinary gender which is feminine in nature

Fluidflux: the feeling of being fluid between two or more genders that also fluctuate in intensity; a combination of genderfluid and genderflux

Gemigender: having two opposite genders that work together, being fluid and flux together

Genderblank: a gender that can only be described as a blank space; when gender is called into question, all that comes to mind is a blank space

Genderflow: a gender that is fluid between infinite feelings

Genderfluid: the feeling of fluidity within your gender identity; feeling a different gender as time passes or as situations change; not restricted to any number of genders

Genderflux: the feeling of your gender fluctuating in intensity; like genderfluid but between one gender and agender

Genderfuzz: coined by lolzmelmel; the feeling of having more than one gender that are somehow blurred together to the point of not being able to distinguish or identify individual genders; synonymous with blurgender

Gender Neutral: the feeling of having a neutral gender, whether somewhere in between masculine and feminine or a third gender that is separate from the binary; often paired with neutrois

Genderpunk: a gender identity that actively resists gender norms

Genderqueer: originally used as an umbrella term for nonbinary individuals; may be used as an identity; describes a nonbinary gender regardless of whether the individual is masculine or feminine leaning

Genderwitched: a gender in which one is intrigued or entranced by the idea of a particular gender, but is not certain that they are actually feeling it

Girlflux: when one feels mostly or all female most of the time but experiences fluctuating intensities of female identity

Glassgender: a gender that is very sensitive and fragile

Glimragender: a faintly shining, wavering gender

Greygender: having a gender that is mostly outside of the binary but is weak and can barely be felt

Gyragender: having multiple genders but understanding none of them

Healgender: a gender that once realized, brings lots of peace, clarity, security, and creativity to the individual’s mind

Heliogender: a gender that is warm and burning

Hemigender: a gender that is half one gender and half something else; one or both halves may be identifiable genders

Horogender: a gender that changes over time with the core feeling remaining the same

Hydrogender: a gender which shares qualities with water

Imperigender: a fluid gender that can be controlled by the individual

Intergender: the feeling of gender falling somewhere on the spectrum between masculine and feminine. Meant for intersex people only

Juxera: a feminine gender similar to girl, but on a separate plane and off to itself

Libragender: a gender that feels agender but has a strong connection to another gender

Magigender: a gender that is mostly gender and the rest is something else

Mascfluid: A gender that is fluid in nature, and restricted only to masculine genders

Mascgender: a non-binary gender which is masculine in nature.

Maverique: taken from the word maverick; the feeling of having a gender that is separate from masculinity, femininity, and neutrality, but is not agender; a form of third gender

Mirrorgender: a gender that changes to fit the people around you

Molligender: a gender that is soft, subtle, and subdued

Multigender: the feeling of having more than one simultaneous or fluctuating gender; simultaneous with multigenderand omnigender

Nanogender: feeling a small part of one gender with the rest being something else

Neutrois: the feeling of having a neutral gender; sometimes a lack of gender that leads to feeling neutral

Nonbinary: originally an umbrella term for any gender outside the binary of cisgenders; may be used as an individual identity; occasionally used alongside of genderqueer

Omnigender: the feeling of having more than one simultaneous or fluctuating gender; simultaneous with multigenderand polygender

Oneirogender: coined by anonymous, “being agender, but having recurring fantasies or daydreams of being a certain gender without the dysphoria or desire to actually be that gender day-to-day”

Pangender: the feeling of having every gender; this is considered problematic by some communities and thus has been used as the concept of relating in some way to all genders as opposed to containing every gender identity; only applies to genders within one’s own culture

Paragender: the feeling very near one gender and partially something else which keeps you from feeling fully that gender

Perigender: identifying with a gender but not as a gender

Polygender: the feeling of having more than one simultaneous or fluctuating gender; simultaneous with multigenderand omnigender

Proxvir: a masculine gender similar to boy, but on a separate plane and off to itself

Quoigender: feeling as if the concept of gender is inapplicable or nonsensical to one’s self

Subgender: mostly agender with a bit of another gender

Surgender: having a gender that is 100% one gender but with more of another gender added on top of that

Systemgender: a gender that is the sum of all the genders within a multiple or median system

Tragender: a gender that stretches over the whole spectrum of genders

Transgender: any gender identity that transcends or does not align with your assigned gender or society’s idea of gender; the feeling of being any gender that does not match your assigned gender

Trigender: the feeling of having three simultaneous or fluctuating genders

Vapogender: a gender that sort of feels like smoke; can be seen on a shallow level but once you go deeper, it disappears and you are left with no gender and only tiny wisps of what you thought it was

Venngender: when two genders overlap creating an entirely new gender; like a venn diagram

Verangender: a gender that seems to shift/change the moment it is identified

Vibragender: a gender that is usually one stable gender but will occasionally changes or fluctuate before stabilizing again

Vocigender: a gender that is weak or hollow